weekend notes: it was good to be back home—exhausting, though, and i may have burnt myself out. a good concert (we raised over $40,000?!) and lovely to see familiar faces. one thing i keep forgetting is that people change – everything changes – and i keep expecting to come home and find that everything’s the same, and sometimes it is, but often there are subtle adjustments and shifts that i don’t realize until much later. that is, home is still home but it has also transformed in these small ways, and sometimes i feel sad about that. even though i know it’s inevitable. after the concert, someone came up to me and said that my playing had changed, that it was different from before. i wasn’t sure how to respond and thought about that all night. (and i didn’t ask if it had changed for the better, because if there’s anything i know, it’s that change is never a black and white concept).
anyway, i’m about to board the flight and i’m listening to some Mahler. it’s such a beautiful day.